Former top-30 GM Handsome Pete mulls comeback...
Jan 8, 2021 1:57:46 GMT -5
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Post by Handsome Pete on Jan 8, 2021 1:57:46 GMT -5
Former top-30 GM Handsome Pete mulls comeback...
WASHINGTON, DC - After a long retirement, sources close to the long-time Toronto Raptors GM indicate an increased interest in returning to the league in which he made his name. Pete put together a long, unremarkable string of seasons as the chief decision maker for the Toronto Raptors, peaking with one surprise title over Ankly that has been clouded in controversy and accusations of payola. Following his stint with the Raptors, Pete moved on to the Houston Rockets, where he assembled one of the greatest collections of talent in league history and did fuckall with them. He left shortly thereafter, opting to spend more time with his family and focus on his first love, other people’s money.
In a recent interview, Pete indicated that he's still as sharp as ever. "As far as I'm concerned, the game is still the game. I'm confident that I could walk in to any job in the league and easily be one of the top 20 to 25 GMs. The new generation is soft, with all of these analytics and advanced stats. Give me a Pickles Kennedy or a Brain Winter and I'll show you what a 7-seed really looks like." Pete then spent several minutes making obscene gestures and talking about the handcheck rule.
Other GMs around the league had strong reactions to the rumors. "I didn't even realize he left" said Skrouse. “I thought we agreed not to invite Pete” said Soup.
No one is sure which GM will slip up first and lose his job, but it won’t take long before the rumor mill starts turning and a team turns to Pete to ask him to lead them to glory—to which he will reply, “probably not”.
WASHINGTON, DC - After a long retirement, sources close to the long-time Toronto Raptors GM indicate an increased interest in returning to the league in which he made his name. Pete put together a long, unremarkable string of seasons as the chief decision maker for the Toronto Raptors, peaking with one surprise title over Ankly that has been clouded in controversy and accusations of payola. Following his stint with the Raptors, Pete moved on to the Houston Rockets, where he assembled one of the greatest collections of talent in league history and did fuckall with them. He left shortly thereafter, opting to spend more time with his family and focus on his first love, other people’s money.
In a recent interview, Pete indicated that he's still as sharp as ever. "As far as I'm concerned, the game is still the game. I'm confident that I could walk in to any job in the league and easily be one of the top 20 to 25 GMs. The new generation is soft, with all of these analytics and advanced stats. Give me a Pickles Kennedy or a Brain Winter and I'll show you what a 7-seed really looks like." Pete then spent several minutes making obscene gestures and talking about the handcheck rule.
Other GMs around the league had strong reactions to the rumors. "I didn't even realize he left" said Skrouse. “I thought we agreed not to invite Pete” said Soup.
No one is sure which GM will slip up first and lose his job, but it won’t take long before the rumor mill starts turning and a team turns to Pete to ask him to lead them to glory—to which he will reply, “probably not”.